Monday 20 February 2012

Father

Challenging days personally as my family respond and care for my Dad who is in hospital, having had a fall last week. Nothing broken, but at the age of 91 - alotted with all the many other struggles of being that old, a fall is significant.

I was thinking how important Dad's are, and reliving the many memories I have of my dad:
I remember the numerous occasions when I would be ill in bed with a temperature and dad would always worry, and then at the end of the day re-appear with a bottle of Lucozade to give me recovery energy.

I remember the moment when we laid the concrete for the house drive and we all had to dip our toes into concrete to imprint our feet into the finished drive.

The moment when we were sailing just he and me, and the wind became too strong and I was panicking and we had to beach because I wasn't heavy enough.

The numerous times Dad would be doing DIY and I would watch and learn, and how he would let me have a go.

The days when he and mum would come to watch me play rugby, even though other priorities could have called.

The times when he would mend my bike, and when the car came later - sometimes at late hours, spend time and effort repairing it to make it work.

I remember Dad's constantly messy office desk - papers everywhere, and thinking how on earth can he ever find anything, and then 30 years on find that my desk has ended up the same.

I think of the spirit in my dad that never gave up, that never gave in to something being un-mendable and the amazing lateral thinking that produced solutions where others would have thrown away.

More recently I remember Dad saying to me how he was so proud of me, as he in his frailty had lost dexterity and technical ability and watched me do, what he used to, and feeling so deeply moved by Dad's words.

The days ahead are really quite challening, and I'm not sure that I let alone my mum or my brothers are ready for what may or may not develop.

Thursday 9 February 2012

Loving what I do

I love what I do as a Pastor - I think I've kind of blogged on this before, so pardon me please, but this is fresh in me this morning.

Last night I spent time visiting someone and shared with them about the baptism of the Holy Spirit and the challenge of struggling with the old and the new person (as Paul puts it in Romans) and how character change and growth can be a struggle.

But when I compare last night with what I have also done this week and recently, it shows the huge breadth and variety - I have hoovered the church hall, cleaned some church toilets, prep'd a discussion document on mentoring and christian education, prep'd the leaders agenda and minutes, scoured the net for the best price on a Henry Hoover, and recently spent some time re-wiring and positioning the church broadband router.
Then I've spent time thinking, reflecting and planning - and oh yes, preping last week a sermon on "Hope". Planned a few services online, engaged in some Baptist Association work, and followed the Church of England synod debates on twitter. Then i have admin'd some church papers, visited a few people to listen and pray with them, checked through some minutes, glued a church table, stacked some chairs, and done an assembly, planned my diary and spent some time listening to others and yes, listening to myself!

Then I've updated the church web site, done some planning on my own personal web site and spent a few moments social networking - oh yes! This week my car developed a moment of black smoke, but I sorted that once I realised the air-con belt was coming off - so a quick fiddle and mend. Yes, I do love fiddling with practical stuff, DIY, and electronics or computing - all part of being a pastor it would seem, and I do have those skills in my bag. I've spent some time listening to elderly parents and the emotions that come with their struggles.

No funerals recently, but that might change, you never know given the cold. Now, if I'm wise, I need to plan for sunday week's sermon - again, on hope; I hope I can sort that and get ahead, because next week is half term and I always, always blank that out for family. Then there is the cleaning and dusting and ironing to do at home too - I tend to have mass moments on those, though Claire is very good too when she has time. My fundamental focus at the moment though is my family and my wife.

There is a tremendous variety in being a Pastor. That at time can be a huge delight and joy and at other times the variety is the very worst part of the job. Sometimes you long for a borring, steady, regular activity, and at other times the variety makes it!

But I suppose what is really coming to me in recent days is that I have a growing passion for the pastoral care and support of other Christian Leaders and Pastor's. After 20+ years in ministry I can honestly say that I know what it's like to be pastoring a church. I know the heights and the depths of the call, the moments of delight and pain. And in short I have a passion to be with Pastor's in their struggles and to help them and care for them pro-actively with what I hope would be wisdom, encouragement and insight. What I've learned through my own struggles has not been lost in a Romans 8: 28 context, and I have much that I feel I can pass on.

There is a website that people are getting excited alot about in the baptist zone called beyond400.net. It seems you have to be a big cheese to contribute, but if I had to contribute something for the UK Baptist world (and I doubt I'll get asked) in the next few decades (past the 400 years we have been in the UK), I would write an article on "Who Pastor's the Pastors" and the priority of Pastoral Care for Christian Leaders.

Where I have blogged in recent months on Christian Ministry undergoing major paradigm shifts predominantly in the local church scene, leads me to ask the question - I wonder if how we operate regionally, and in particular in pastoral care of Pastors, is also about to change?

Oh, and just to finish, you can buy a Henry Hoover for £55 on ebay!

Monday 6 February 2012

A sign of the times and stuff

I keep my eyes open - sometimes it a bit like radar, but this morning something quite profound caught my eye as I paid for the fuel at the petrol station on the school run. It was a mum and two girls at the Costa counter. The girls were primary aged and in school uniform - standard for that time of dy. But what caught my eye was that she was saying for them to choose a sausage roll from the hot counter. Perhaps not unusual, except that it was just past 8am. Then my mind did some jumps and I realised that it was their breakfast. Then I did some more jumps and thought - yes, the mum looks single, on her own, and this was the best that she could do before school for them. As I walked out of the shop, I did a quick suss of the car they had gotten into, and well yes, ok, my prejudice made me do some more jumps, and concluded that she was recently seperated. Well, I don't know whether I was right or wrong, or whether my Sherlock deduction was appropriate, but I came away feeling sad for a while as I did the life building summary of those 3 lives that I had seen. Right or wrong, I do that some times, and couldn't help but think that it was a sign of the times that we are living in.

Well its February, and time is shifting on. I get the feeling that this year is going to speed by what with all that is planned nationally for us. Mixed emotions on that - do i want this year to steam by or go slow?