Smart-phones or Dumb-phones?

I can't find the report and I wasn't completely listening, but this morning whilst listening to Radio 4 Today, some new study was reported on mobile phone behaviour patterns which kind of made my ears prick up. The headline went something like "people would be happy to lose many things, but their smartphone would be their most treasurer possession!" If I find the report, or if you find, we'll let each other know (send me a text!!).
Of course, there are no real surprises here, the last 25 years has seen a technological revolution akin to the industrial revolution, but what is perhaps something to reflect upon is that we as a human race have/are arguably not adapted well to this. The headline stories that have dripped out over the last 10 years of people's lives falling apart at the loss of their phone - "man drowns in road drain as he head first searches for his phone that dropped down into it" have got to bring us up sharp to question whether we are getting our priorities right.

But let me confess (of course you will know this if you know me well) that I am part of the problem, but I would like to think that I could be a part of the solution? I love my smartphone too. I love everything that it does for me. I take a monthly mag to read up on the latest developments, & this week I tried to upgrade a year early, but no way! As an Android user I like what my phone does for me, and yes it really does work for me. My phone keeps my diary & contacts that syncs to my office PC, it keeps track of ten of my email accounts (I have others), allows me to store important data, make use of dropbox, social network to my 3 Facebook accounts, and 2 Twitter accounts, as well as update my blog, GPS navigate, browse the net, read the Times newspaper, listen to the radio and podcast, play music, scan barcodes, watch auction items on ebay, play games, take photo's and videos, watch iplayer, read books, .......oh and yes, of course, how stupid, text and make phone calls! Truth is, my smartphone kind of runs my life.
But let me make a 2nd confession to you: more and more now, particulary at the end of the day I'm getting borred of my smartphone, and actually have had enough of the way in which it dominates my life! In essence I find myself feeling that there must be more to life than this blessed clever lump of plastic, which seems to dominate my life. And whenever the different ring tones go off for each inbox, or text, why do I feel that I need to respond to it? Actually, far from improving my life and making life better, easier(?)  it's made it worse. I actually don't want to be available 24-7. (Ah, but there's an app to sort that you know!).

But let me widen this away from personification to some observations. So much has the mobile impacted upon our culture, that now we often see people communicating with each other via text or social media, than having a face to face conversation. Think nothing of 2 friends chatting, whilst one of the friends is texting away to another friend somwhere else. Couples can now be seen to argue or sort out their relationships and or divorce or seperation by text. Bosses and companies seem to make workers redundant by text or email! And seemingly the camera life of the mobile has now been twisted and perverted so that it has become a tool of child abuse and sexual perversion. Of course it cuts both ways, probably the fall of middle east countries would not have happened without social media! But it seems our culture is so infected, that we even see people coming to church now and texting or surfing during the service, and children playing DS and Ipod games!
All in all, the archetypal image in the UK is of the person walking down the street with childen in tow, not enjoying the world, and chatting and playing with the kids, but on the phone to someone. The person rushing down the street - and in their hands will be keys and phone in hand. And the example we are setting to our children is that all of this is just fine - "go and do likewise, don't actually talk to people or play anymore, but pick up a console and use it! Don't talk to your parents and friends face to face about your fears and concerns and the day you've had, but go on your phone, ipod or games console!" So if our society and culture is falling apart because our children no longer have the social skills or ability to chat, debate, listen, forgive, cry, negotiate and emphasise, then don't blame them, but look to the example we are setting them.

I cannot but reflect upon the time we are wasting, the life we are losing, the skills we are forgetting, the relationships we are killing. Consider: if you spend 1 hour a day social networking, or 3 hours a day attached to your mobile, thats 7 hours and 21 hours respectively. It's also 364 hours a 156 hours a year respectively. Thats 29,120 hours and 12,480 hours in a typical lifetime of 80 years. Think what else we could be doing, the places we could go. And all of that is just on the phone, it doesn't include people going on to laptops, ipads and PC's, which might add a further 4 + hours a week. Think about these daft apps - both on phones and Facebook, games such as Farmville and the like that you are invited to play in your own little protected cyber world, that keep making you want to go back for more and more and more. Think about how overweight the population is growing as we sit in zero physical activity. Think about the number of workers who might today whilst at work on the works time, sit in front of their Facebook page! If we agree that our communities, families and relationships are falling apart, then look no further than these issues for the root of the problems.

As a Christian I hear the words of Jesus "I have come that you might have life, and have it abundantly" ringing in my ears, and I reflect that what is killing this full life, is our own lack of discipline and focus.

So I want to suggest that it's only our own personal decision to manage our lives IN DISCIPLINE that can save us from this creeping disease. It's something that I need to do more, and you do too. Let's not "throw the baby out with the bathwater" mind, but lets choose to live differently! Here are some sugegstions that I too am taking up:

• Switch the phone off at 7pm and on again at 7am, and definitely put it away at meal times.
• Ration your social networking hours - see it as credit to be used, like a calories that must not be exceeded.
• Work hard at having face to face conversations, not text ones.
• Have periods of fasting from all of these powerful forces, espec Facebook and Twitter.
• Never let it control you, but you control it!
• Re-discover the joys of talking to your spouse and children.
• Instead of going on the phone or computer, go walk, swim, cycle or kick, or even read a book!

All in all, SWITCH IT OFF!

Routine - oh how I love thee ....mostly!

I'm adjusting to a new routine, and to be honest it's a bit of a challenge. Now I love routine, and I've predominantly been in the same one for around 9 years. It's all to do with school you see - all that drop off and pick up stuff. But two of our family have now changed school and that's in the nearby main town - a 15 minute drive, and now two out of the three can get to school at 8am. So for the first time in about 9 years all children and mum are out of the house on the school run by 7.50am. This means the two of my feet hitting the floor at 6.01am - having listened to Radio 4 headlines, and not returning to a horizontal position to somewhere about 7.30am! Gone are our days of sitting in bed with a cup of tea listening to the news and everntually stirring - oh no! And all of this leaves all of us, and me, suddenly, with a new routine! And it's a shock to the system.

Now I love routine. I love knowing where I need to be when and kind of getting into the groove with it. I'm not sure where if at all I learnt routine, or whether I was divinely programmed for it. Was it at boarding school when as a 10year old the bell would always go to wake us, and we were drilled in doing exactly the same each day? Don't know! Or was it when I first took up gainful employment as an Apprentice Engineer at Wellworthy's Weymouth, and needed to cycle everyday the 7 miles or so, leaving the house at 6.30am (we began work at 7.30am), and thus drilling myself to be up at the same time everyday, fed, watered, red my bible and out the door, come whatever the weather through at me down the Weymouth beach road? Don't know! Or was it, as I probably guess can also be the case, the routine of my mum passed to baby in womb? Or was it years and years of hearing my parents teasmade go off at 6.30am with a kind of machine gun alarm - which I'm sure dad appreciated from an army tradition point of view! Don't know!

But I do remember in the first few years of ministry in my first church going to a conference by Christian Research, entitled "Priorities, Planning and Paperwork" led by Peter Brierely, and finding the self awareness and skill personality tests a total revelation, and finding for the first time in my entire life that I had discovered the real me. This was my personality type, and it was ok. This was how I fitted into team and these were my skills, and it was ok. And most freeing of all - this was how God had made me, and that was ok too! That then fast turned to be cross and wondering why we hadn't done such awareness courses at Spurgeon's and thinking - "if only"!

So I love routine, and to be honest there are time when I think I would be at home in a monastery with the regular times around the clock to pray and read the offices of that hour. In fact I prefer routine as a good basis for my prayer life, and really appreciate the Northumbrian Community Offices. I'd enjoy the routines of the work pattern I'm sure. But I'd be very lonely in  a Munkery and soon find that that it didn't fit my outlook to be a techy as well as my love of home and family life.
And Ministry I find is more often than not the complete antithesis of routine - it is so often completely varied, one day being totally different with unique challenges. One day I might be preping a talk or the like, another day leading a funeral, another -a pastoral visit, another - prepping a meeting, another - repairing and doing maintenance, and another - maintaining the church office computer network or the like, as well as updatng the website. I could go on! I could mention strategy, vision, worship, prayer etc.

But the personality profiles remind us that actually no one of us is the same. And I love the verse that says in the scriptures that we are fearfully and wonderfully made. We are truly rainbow in variety (of personality and character) and as a Christian I see entirely the handiwork of the creator behind all of this who "knit us together in our mother's womb" and which reminds us that we are not accidents, but wonderfully made for purpose in love by Yahweh our creator. And all that means that whilst I love routine, others don't. Others are more creative and adventurous and love the unplanned and the new experience etc etc.
And there are downsides to the routine and mundane of course, just as there are downsides to the creative. The Popular Sanguine type who organises, needs to cheer up the Perfect Melancholy type, who needs to tone down the Powerful Choleric type, whilst the Peaceful Phlegmatic type needs motivating! (see Personality Plus - how to undestand others by understanding yourself, by Florence Littauer).
And truly, it is only when we understand who we are in Christ, that can ever hope to understand anyone else, let alone listen or minister to them.

So, its back to my routine, and like John Cleese in the film "Clockwork", as its now 9.32am, I need to be drinking my coffee! Enjoy discovering who you are.

After the age of 35 ....

....It all goes down hill! No, no, I'm only joking. That's the age of .....oh sorry, I can't remember.

I recollect that at the age of 22years, the Spurgeon's College Council of that time, - wherein I trained for the Christian Ministry and obtained my degree in theology, only just agreed to allow me to train, because they thought I was lacking in experience. If it wasn't for the then Student Chair and Secretary (who have a place on the Council) who fought my corner, + one or two other worthys, then everything could have been oh so different. But that was back in 1987, and now 25years later I am now .....well, quite experienced. But what does that mean?

Seven years later on when in my first church, a particular couple decided to make an issue of the fact that their young minister wasn't very experienced (still!) and it drew out of me then I quite defensive reaction, and led me to preach on where experience came from, and whether that was a mark of maturity or not. I think looking back I hashed up the preach somewhat.

It is true to say that the youthful days (under 35?!) gives to all an outlook on life with views that are often black and white, and yes hasty in response. And every "youth" seems to be the same - ask them a question and there is always only one answer and it's got to be NOW! Don't be stupid Dad, this IS the answer, how can you hold such archaic views? Truth is, as you get older, life is not quite as clear cut, and our answers become less hasty, and more measured and considered. From what? Why? From experience of course!

25 years later (in ministry, that is) I can honestly say that the majority of experience has come from learning lessons, and in all honesty quite a bit of that has been uncomfortable, if not at times painful. The experience I have gained has come at a price, but it has been the making of me, and yes the maturing of me. Seemingly experiences likes these only come from one means - growing in and through the difficulties. Well that's on the plus side, but on the negative being a Baptist Pastor has come at a huge cost - emotionally and practically, as well yes as spiritually, to my family and I, and being now in the middle age (the period of the pondering) I often ponder as I look back whether it had to be this way.

Stepping aside from ministry for a moment, to me as a person and the 46years on this earth, the truth is that life (and in no way do I see this as different to any one else) has in no way been plain sailing. I certainly never envisaged being a Minister of the Gospel for the first 20years of my life, and "if I knew then what I knew now" would I have taken such a road? Was that the right decision? I could have been an Engineer! I could have .....well anyway!

Christians believe in the scriptures talking of the "call" of God, and that individuals respond to such a call - like Abraham and Sarah, to leave to follow the call without knowing where they were to go, but leave they had to do! Christians don't believe that our lives are simply our own to do with as we please, but to follow God's call, wherever that may be and whatever that may mean.

And then I remember Billy Graham's strap line in his passionate evangelistic preaching - "God has a plan for your life" - and at the time, that felt like a neat concept, and one that appealed to that black and white youthful outlook. But 30 years on I would argue that the word "plan" suggests it is all worked out, and the word I would use now is "blueprint" - that God knows the structure in and around which freedom of choice is exercised. Of course some Christians believe that absolutely every tiny detail of every moment for, and every choice we make, is God made. This is the age old tussle of predestination verus freewill, and for some thats what they want and are comfortable with. But this blog is not going to do predestination - but you knew that anyway, didn't you?!

And this is all of course about knowing what decision to make about this or that, and how we know guidance and wisdom. It's also about "perspective" - this is another key word. I remember an illustration by my Theology Tutor (yes, Nigel, I listened) who gave the example of an incident in a street that is witnessed by a number of different people from different angles (or perspective), and each when reported to a journalist or policeman, gives a slightly different perspective on what took place. So, which was the right perspective? Which was the truth? Perspectives can shape and change decisions, but be warned the perspective of consumer comfort wonders around like a devouring lion: We all want an easy life, easy decisions and lots of comfort, with little challenge. For some, decision making seems reduced to this level - a kind of Homer Simpson theology: if something in life is too hard, then its not worth doing!

And in our lives there are lots of perspectives to consider. We might use another word "viewpoint(s)", and seek to obtain the perspectives of people around us on what they think about a situation in our lives. For the Christian, the "God-perspective" is vital - how does God see it all? Trouble is that post-modernism has blurred these perspectives somewhat and kind of stated that all perspectives might be true, rather than just one or another, and that can leave us bewildered, particularly if we start thinking "what if?"

But snap my figers and snap out of it; this middle age pondering does no one any good, even if it be a part of what all middle aged people do. Life is as it is now. And we must live life with the consequences of our decisions, even if they were taken early in life, and in haste and somehow regretted or even applauded. And for the Christian, there is a framework in which we do this. The decisions, promises, and following of calls that have been made - whether in hindsight right or wrong, must be honoured because life is not just now, this second. These might be broken, but not for the Christian, ours is a higher calling. Many are secondary promises with not huge consequences maybe and can be modified, adapted or changed, but some are major covenantal decisions and are lifetime decisions. These matter and as Christians we will be judged for the decisions we made and those that we broke. There is journey - and it is the whole of life, not just in the here and now. The God who first called is the one who is a part of the covenants that we make and is the maker not the breaker. In the blueprint sense, he leads us on in the journey from now and into the future, and is faithful, and we too are required to be faithful.

But the one question I will have for God will be why we cannot have experience and youthful energy? We all know that with age comes experience, but with age comes the bad back and flagging energy. But why God?

But this I know: with God in our lives, no experience - however painful or uncomfortable is ever wasted, especially when we turn it to God's glory and let it be used. Romans 8: 28 reminds us of this.

OMG

I've been reflecting on a tweet from someone, showing a piece of Argos Jewellery - a necklace, which merely has the letters "OMG" to hang around someone's neck. The tweet suggested the total pointlessness of either the manufacturer or Argos themselves, and I agree.
Of course "OMG" is the new abbreviated form (seems to have entered our language in this decade) of the old swearing statement "Oh my God", which I find as I listen - seems to come out now from even 4 year olds.
There are several points to make here: First, for the Christian, God's name is precious and the scriptures leave no room for argument that taking God's name and misusing it is not right, and especially so for the Christian.
Secondly, I find myself puzzled, bemused even, as to why there is this fascination with an abbreviation of "Oh my God." I suppose the virus of abbreviations is arguably bound to hit everything eventually, and it was only a matter of time. Perhaps three words are, for some, just too much and saying "OMG" is somehow a lot less hassle? Or is it that the message of not misuing God's name has now got out into people's minds, and someone has suggested that saying "OMG" is somehow less offensive? Well, it isn't!

For me, whenever I hear someone say this I always want to feel that I should turn to them and say "ah, but who is your god then? - as if to make the point. But the long and the short of it is that I find it offensive. And I find the celebrity trend of somehow saying it live on TV, or singing about it, ...or whatever else, is horrible, and I don't like the example that that sets or suggest to such a mass following.

To widen this out - I hear, as we all do, an enormous amount of swearing - and when I get very stressed or angry, I have found myself sadly doing so. But when I hear someone saying "Jesus" or "Oh my God", then that makes me cross. Is that hypocrisy I wonder?
Of course, the anguish behind what makes us (all?) swear is an interesting study: that surge of stress or anger that frustrated us and makes us scream out aloud. Isn't that a little like what the psalms do in the scriptures? But they're not full of bad language - anger sometimes - yes. I've often mused at the story of the old Chistian man banging his head on the same shelf and saying "Praise the Lord!"

Is swearing then just about poor vocabulary? I have in my 46 years heard that said by a good few people - was it my English teacher? Certainly, families that are brought up in an environment where swearing is the norm, then often the children see this as what they should do too.

Then of course, we might argue that there is swearing, and then then swearing - ie, plain rudeness and then those words that dishonour the name of God. Does that make the former acceptable and the latter not then? I know the some have studied the root of each swear word and discovered that actually the truth behind each is quite alarming - eg "Blimey" was apparently originally "Blind-me".

So where does this end? Better education? Better example? Christians standing up and being counted? Probably all - though I also have cringed sometimes when Christians have been so "in someones face" as they have cut into them about their bad langauge and wanted to run a mile from such hypocrisy. How do we win such folk for Jesus when someone has already ploughed in and mucked up the playing field? Certainly Paul reminds us that the peope of the Holy Spirit will want to live by the Spirit.


Moving onto a entirely different subject ...my Android Mobile and O/S upgrade.
Ice cream sandwhich - thought I'd note this for anyone who has to travel this road. My Samsung Galaxy S2 finally brought me to a point where the SD card was malfunctioing and internal memory as a result was crashing out. Vodafone said all these problems I had would be sorted with the ICS update.The word of the street for months has been about this O/S upgrade from gingerbread to ICS, Ice Cream Sandwich!

So for me the phone was becoming a struggle and not an effective tool. A visit to the vodafone shop last week said "Sure, we can do the upgrade, but havr you backed up?" So back home to backup to Samsung Kies. This I managed, eventually.
Back to the shop - "Oh, it says we can't do it afterall, but we can send if off!" No, I didn't want that as I couldn't be without my diary. So then I phoned Vodafone only to be told that they weren't responsible for O/S upgrades, but Samsung are. A classic moment in techy life - finally the open source nature of Google and Android catches up with me. This is its strength and its weakness.
An upgrade I was told would sort my original problems, but the £40 quid paid to vodafone every month doesn't cover that scenario then?! Kind of leaves you "naffed off" (ooh is that ok given my words above?) and running the argument that this would never happen with Apple or HTC!
So, to conclude I finally get through to Samsung who ........wait for it .......tell me I can't upgrade ......yet!


So, this week is the calm before the storm (or is it the other way around as parents look forward to days of peace?), as we try to gather some last few days of rest before schools go back and routine kicks in.

We haven't had much of a holiday this year.One week, and it was stressful! As we spend money on new uniforms and equipment, the economic news is not imporoving for the UK, and the financial pressure continues to target the middle and lower income families of the UK. We are one of them, and there are many. The light at the end of the tunnel is not showing up, and despite the Jubilee and the Olympics, the nation is in general rudderless an lacking any good economic news. Unless something changes, then I see a General Election in the pipe line!

Sports in Schools - the real problem

Okay, so I'm going to throw my 5 quid into the arena on this, and I think I can do this with some credibility. Here's my argument - the measley 2 lessons (practically its 1) of PE a week in each primary school shows up where our values and priorities have drifted. Numerous governments have played with the national curriculum arguing that their electorate has demanded change for so called failing schools. Such schools if they are deemed to not be reaching the required standard, are set targets, and the entire Ofsted nightmare of every school seemingly being measured by whether it has had a good one or not. This either shames or applauds a local school in a community and presumably provides informed decision making freedom for parents. But here's the problem - all that is based on academic prowess, not on sport. Did they achieve in maths and english - for example.
When I was growing up in school, every morning was set for lessons and every afternoon was for compulsory sport. Summer or winter, good weather or bad - we would be either running or playing rugby or hockey in winter, and atheletic and tennis or cricket in the summer. For me, the sport was survival. The academic side was a real struggle, but the Sport kept me alive and gave me value. Goodness knows what would have happened if I hadn't had that. In the mornings we thought and worked better, and in the afternon we burnt off our energy and played sport to high standards.
But now we have a virtually sportless school culture in the state school system. The sport has been tossed into the court of after school clubs.
If the Olympics is to change our sporting future, we have to kill the notion that the value of a person or a school is based on how well they achieve academically, and return to the days where a whole person approach is seen as a good thing, not a disability.

To home school or not to home school

I haven't blogged for ages and ages - excuses being lack of time and too busy and also that they decded to put me on the Baptist Times website which made me feel kinda vulnerable ....anyway, the real truth was I just haven't felt in the right state of mind to "spill my thoughts out!"
Okay, excuses done, here's some thoughts that have been on my mind for a while that I thought would be provocative for blogging on. We don't home school, and to be honest I don't think that Claire and I would feel that its the ever the right thing to do, given our Christian principles! That said, if we were missionaries overseas where there was no english speaking schools then we might, but its certainly not something that we would find easy. Some people home-school because they can - and choose to do so. Parents are trained teachers and maybe they feel they can do a better job than their local school. But some Christian parents choose to do so because they fear their children being infected by other religious traditions, secularism, and multi-culturalism. Taking the Old Testament principles of teaching your own children up in the law of Yahweh and ensuring that the principles of God are held dear to the heart and taught with a clarity and fundamentalism of there being no doubt or room to ponder, alongside teaching maths, english, science and history etc, this is often the style of many (but perhaps not all) home schoolers within the Christian setting. The advantages of this are all too obvious. All of this happens within the Christian Community - often Christian home schoolers will share skills across several families within that community. This is ironic and arguably where home-schooling ceases to be home-schooling and more akin to creating your own Christian school. The settings are safe, and the curriculum set and sealed. Creationism taught and assumed in subject areas. Common to all home-schooling - whether Christian or not is that children with specific gifting and skills areas can be focussed upon in a strong contrast to the more general teaching of a school, and of course, the teacher to student ration is exceptionally and desirably win-win!
The disadvantages however are more than obvious. The lack of connection with other children from all kinds of backgrounds and experiences, religious groupings and cultures, colours and creeds, would almost certaintly lead to an extremely insular life, in fact protected. Because of this, the freedom to think and decide for yourself - and be given licence to do so and not feel that this was wrong or shameful are generally not present in the home school setting. Interestingly enough, this is where my Christian baptistic thinking finds good soil. As Christians of a baptist flavour, we see in the scriptures the principle not to christen, but to baptise in believers baptism. Unpacking this, we choose not to say over a baby "we believe on your behalf", but that, growing up within the love of God and the love of parents, and of the Christian community, that child should decide for him or herself as to whether they should want to follow Jesus and become a Christian. When they do, only then does Believers Baptism take place. And that is not age dependent in any way. That means to say that our children need to be given the freedom to know and experience the love of God in regular Sunday worship and any other mid week setting, but that they also be fully open to the sights, smells and sounds (so to speak) of what is going on around them in a state school where their friends think and act differently. We think that giving them freedom to decide for themselves, is the biblical pattern, rather than it be forced upon them. Which creates the stronger more considered and throught through faith? I'lll leave you to decide that for yourself. But that is in essence why I/we don't home school, apart from the truth that we'd be rubbish at it too.
There is a middle ground to be pondered here though. Why then, does it feel right for some parents to ensure that their children go to a Christian school? Isn't that merely the half way compromise that is there for parents like us who can't home school to save our lives, but want the safety of the Christian culture and setting? Well certainly in the UK the Christian schools that provide that kind of setting are seemingly mostly private fee paying types. And in any case, I wonder sometimes what is so specific about such places? Is it that the staff are all Christians? Clearly not - in many cases merely signed up very distant members of the CofE. But they get to have a daily act of worship! Oh yes .... and mostly sing traditonal hymns from the 1940's....ugh! So probably, the difference is not huge, except that you get to part with your money and feel that you are investing into your children's lives. That may salve your concsience of course.
So, to home school or not? Isn't this me just finding a set of doctrines to match what we want to do? Perhaps - as I said, we couldn't home school to save our lives.But we both have some very free thinking discussions with all our children along the lines of "it's not quite as black and white as that actually ..." We do so because we want our kids to think and decide for themselves, within the love of God. I think ...no I hope that they will one day thank us for that. Or is that just a hoped for dream!!

Flooding

"A weathered boat
once with sail and go-fast stripe,
at one time considered the latest
must-have model, now
cast adrift,
left to float with every tidal
ebb and flow.
Cut free by intentional sharp blade:
misunderstood; manipulated; misinterpreted,
allowed to twist and turn, to twist in the tidal
stream,
away from it's intended purpose of
holding, transporting, carrying.
Originally shaped for significance,
moulded and manufactured for a higher calling,
of service and serving,
now discarded, unwanted, bruised;
alive but dead,
rotted in places, scratched and
chaffed.
Floating until captured, retained, rescued or
sunk,
never to be remembered or held, or fulfilled
again."

April showers

Well, this week it's my vowed aim to get away from being too serious - probably. At least away from anything too controversial - probably.

I was with my wife and one of our kids at some NHS clinic thingy this week, and a test was given to our offspring and the person said to them "Don't worry, there are no right or wrong answers, everyone's different!" And it was one of those moments where I knew what she was saying re the particular task, but what she had said I just had to note down there and then. It was one of those sentences that seem to be the strap line of th3e age in which we are living - there are no right or wrong answers about life, and the answer you do give is still right, because hey, we're all different! It got me thinking - thats the problem isn't it: the post modern shift away from saying that there is no right or wrong, and its okay to be different. These are the values which now major in our culture in regard to faith and belief, philosophy, expression of self, behaviour, and yes in bringing up children. In fact in virtually everything. There are no longer absolutes being taught or stated. Not so of course within the Christian world!

This last week I came to the realisation that in the town in which I live, there are seemingly no longer any Police. Even the local police station is closed on various days, due to cuts. You never see any Police on the streets anymore, and even those funny peculiar PSO's (the gift of New Labour) have now been been cut back, due to financial realities. Now, minor crime and street dis-order is returning to our towns. We have been given a new "low priority number" 101, which we can now phone if we're concerned. Whereas last year local Police were telling me to dial 999 regardless "to just log it" ....."for statistical purposes", now the new number puts me through to a switchboard in Portishead, I think. Actually, its bit amusing. If I dial 999 from my mobile in Somerset, i get put through to a police operator in Hampshire, who then expreses complete amazement about why this has happened, and "where is that then Sir?". So instead I dial 101 and get a nice recorded voice, which then goes into a waiting stack (I think it plays music) [what should they play?] (Gilbert and Sullivan - "A policeman's lot is not a nappy one [nappy one]). So I'm trying to report some street violence from some drunk young people who are jumping in front of cars, banging on local shops fronts, jumping on and off waiting buses and being fairly crude to everyone, and get told that my call has been given the highest priority possible. But as I explain to my daughter, there's unlikely to anyone on duty except one office has to cover a  50 to 70 mile radius. So, what's the point? And, why are we paying our taxes for local Police funding when there are none to be seen for miles. Ah, but there's CTV - don't get me started!

Finally, as a local school governor who takes his kids to school, I'm desperate to do anything to help. If I seen drains that need clearing of leaves, or leaves that need sweeping up, then surely I should do what any right minded person should do? Get a broom and sweep them up? But oh no! I have to have a risk assessment done! My local head teacher patiently explains to me, that the government hasn't actually done away with the all this litigation rubbish, and in fact I still need to be trained in how to clear up leaves, just in case!

So what has the Charismatic movement ever done for us?

Or ....as Monty Python put "...What have the Romans ever done for us?" And in fact, if you've ever watched that side splitting piece of film sequence from Python, it goes on in this very funny away of "...ok, ok, apart from the plumbing and the roads, and the heating, and the medicine ....what have they done for us? Answer Nothing!. Oh, okay then!"

Sorry, but that had to be done. More importantly, lest we "throw the baby out with the bathwater" (I've never actually been sure if this is technically possible), it would be far too easy to be dismissive then of the charismatic movement (if it is indeed a movement) and suggest that "they" have given us nothing, which would be simply wrong.

By the way, thanks for all the feedback. I hope that what I blogged on last week doesn't make this blog too serious!!

Anyway, I think the charismatic movement has given us a few things worthy of mention:

1. It has reminded us that we live and minister now in "the age of the Spirit." And in my book that means that previously the church had up until the beginings of the charismatic movement in the 1970's largely forgotten the 3rd person of the Trinity. And if theologically we affirm and hold to a Trinitarian foundation then he is there for all to tap into and use. For as any decent theological education will remind us, "one in three persons and yet distinctive." Yes, the Spirit - "he" is readily available for us to minister - him through us, and us to minister him to others.

We can pray to and in/through the Spirit as much as we do with the Father and the Son. We can invite the Spirit to move, or to put it in another way, we can welcome him. What Wimber, Pytches, Subritzky and others have shown us is that we should be quite at home with inviting the Spirit to come and to move amongst us. They seem to have reminded us too that he often comes in waves. As such, we should be aware that it is possible to block or quench (sin against?) the Spirit's work.
Fascinatingly, it was the Quakers with their famous quiet "waiting on the Spirit" to say something that models this for us. They became well known for their "quaking" or shaking in the Spirit as this did this.
Hopefully these days, we are able to hold to a Trinitarian balance in ministry - ie, it's all of them: Father, Son and Holy Spirit. But I just want to throw up a tiny question: have charismatics now over emphasised The Spirit at the expense of the Father and the Son? I ask that, because the freedom of the Spirit that the Corinthian church were criticised for by their Apostle, and which they argued gave them license to be free of him and in many cases do what they want, in some cases allowed them (the Gnostics) to argue that they were now superior to him and even to the Gospel. And I what I see in some places today is Charismatics doing exactly that, which is creating a kind of a new gospel (small g) that is not the gospel of grace and mercy. And the worst of it that in some cases that gospel seems to be turning into a gospel of works, not grace.

I heard it used the other day in terms of prayer, that God now expected more out of us in prayer, and unless we did he somehow wouldn't hear us. Huh! where did that come from in scripture?

2. It has reminded us to expect God - in the Spirit, to do something when ever we gather. And that on the whole has got to be a good thing. That when we gather in worship that it's not simply to go through a series of points on an agenda and be finished by the time the number 11 bus comes by. Rather to expect God to speak to us or move in a tangible way.
This applies for those who set out for church, as they leave their homes to expect the living God to be present, as well as for those who prepare and lead such occasions.
And that's good for us. Lets expect this where perhaps once we didn't.

But, lets not panic or have a downer if we don't seemingly feel that "God was in the house" that morning. Do our feelings suggest he wasn't? And nor should we as a result of any panic somehow feel that we then need to hastily manufacture the experience of the Spirit (can you anyway? No!) which always, always come us somehow feels fraudulent in feel and nature anyway.

And that's where we need to hold breadth in our worship. As much at home with the deep words of liturgy that bring wonder and awe and take our spirits when they are wounded and down on new journeys of the Spirit to places of grace, as with the upbeat, jubilant praise of the prophetic. I cringe ....no i get angry when so new churches roll into town and label such worship experiences as "traditional". As if somehow now they are past the traditional and have gone on to the super advanced mode!

And expecting the Spirit to move does not mean we thefore have no order of service, nor does it mean that we have to have a stringently tied down order of service, but there is balance in there somewhere! And, the Spirit of God is not about dis-order, chaos and lack of preparation.

3. It has reminded us, quite necessarily actually, that worship must have a joyful, and upbeat reality to it. That worship is about God; about his faithfullness and mercy, and power to heal and restore. That worship is as the book of Corinthians make clear a kind of body experience, not an isolated subjective set of choices of the visiting speaker for the day. That the organ is not God's annointed or chosen expression of music, and that he is an author of inifinte colours in the rainbow of worship. And the charismatic movement has given permission to a culture (the English Saxon one) that has been bound up in a "face one direction, behave, wear a suit and don't smile" kind of church behaviour.

4. It has reminded us of the New Testament basis of church function and operation, and God's giving of the gifts for that purpose. It has reminded us that a church goes forward together with those gifts in operation, as a body, not as a bunch of followers of a single human in which it traditonally deemed that everything must be done by or through.

5. It has genuinely brought the new wine of the Spirit into churches that essentially were dead, and or dying. It has started new churches, and new expressions of church, and new ministries that are not typically embedded within local church settings. It has released new people into ministry both here and overseas, who in all probability would never ever have considered themselves likely candidates.

So when all is said and done I thank the Holy Spirit for being gracious enought to visit us again, certainly in my life time. He continues to do so in every land, and in the most suprising of places. Some evern argue that he is more at work at times outside of the church than within!

If it is true - as most do agree, that we are essentially now in "post charismatic days" - whatever that means, then we should no less hunger and thirst for fresh waves of the Spirit of God.

But we do so with wisdom and growth in our hearts, seeking not to make mistakes from the past, and wanting most of all (and I passionately believe this) to be a missioning people that meet people in their struggles truthfully and honourably, and not presenting a Gospel and a God that makes you cringe, but gives you a overriding sense of reality in a broken and needy world!

Come Holy Spirit!

Why I'm a charismatic and why I'm not!

Before I dive in to this blog I need to say that this blog, along with other baptist folk, is now to be published on the new Baptist Times website. So I suppose I'd better behave myself from now on!? I had mixed emotions about the invitation. this blog has been and remains quite a personal publication. I wondered whether I make this one more middle of the road and then start a different more personal one. Och well!

The title of this week's blog is intentional. For a week now this strap line has been banging around inside my head. Actually, I don't like titles that we use (and abuse) in Christian circles; they seem to box people up or state - "they're one of those then!" Actually whereas once - in my youthful student days, I would have arrogantly used this description, I now prefer to use "Spirit filled Christian." And thats as much because I think it's a more accurate description biblilically, but also because I truly want to distance myself from what I see as the very worst of charismatic Christianity.

Please don't get me wrong. Over the years - and beginning as a teenager, I've been to the conferences and done the rounds. Starting first with John Wimber's visits to the UK, Bill Subritsky's tours, and of course what was initially called "The Toronto Blessing" and which became "The Times of Refreshing." And yes, in contrast to some, I felt benefit from the Toronto wave, going to refreshment meetings at Queen's Road Baptist in Wimbledon. I've been baptised in the Spirit, and firmly believe that the gifts of the Spirit are for today, and benefitted hugely from the Power Evangelism/Healing and Bishop David Pytches phases of teaching that came to the UK church. So that's my pedigree, and it remains my practice today. BUT ...there is something within me that wants to fully distance myself from what I call charismatic abuse or as others have called charismania! You see there are some who call themselves charismatic Christians who practice and declare stuff that I just don't want to be seen dead with!

Here is some of that "stuff":
1) The seeing demons everywhere approach. Got a head ache? Then it must be a demon! Cast it out! Got an attitude problem? Then it must be a demon! Cast it out! And so it goes on. And I know the journey that this mish-mash theology has come on because I know the practitioners and writers of it, but I don't see it in the bible! I remember one of those books "Pigs in the Parlour" that suggested exactly what I've outlined above. And this is dangerous stuff, and it can really screw up Christians and make the situation worse. I think of the Derek Prince books and the Ellel Grange camp as routed in Peter Horrobin's ministries. In the worst cases, some have needed therapy to escape from those who have tried to carry out exorcism because it has just been plainly wrong!
2) The declaring that "God has told me this" brigade, which don't get me wrong, I'm not against people expecting God to speak to them, which he does of course, and we should expect him to do so, but when we get this out of control where before long people are making crazy unaccountable statements of such an individualistic nature that life becomes dangerous and careful counsell and discipleship needs to be rapidly engaged.
3) The turning of the Gospel from being one of grace to one of effort where sometimes this becomes a first and second class Christians issue. This is the Gnostic trap whereby people think that they have reached a higher plane of somehow more advanced or more spirituality because they are closer to him, or more spiritual than others because of more experiences of the Holy Spirit. So it is sometimes said - God has raised the bar of effort required or you have to push more into God to experience this revelation of God. I heard this once where some Christians were trying to divide up types of Christian along the lines of "those of the flesh" and "those of the Spirit." In the end, this all seemingly turns in a new Gospel that humans have created, rather than the Gospel of grace.
4) The placing of God on an equal level to Satan and demons - this is the ancient false teaching of dualism re-invented, and this is worked out whereby some Christians feel a need to go round in fear of the devil and his minions. This is where we start to see the "pigs in the parlour" mentality return and spirits or demons, sometimes terrortorial, hanging around at every corner ready to jump out, or hovering over towns making it dark and difficult. What this does is reduce God down onto an equal level with the devil. We devalue God's sovereignty and power, and end up living in fear of the devil, rather than living life to the full in freedom, in the way that Christ intended. This denies the power of the cross, and suggests that God is not sovereignly in control. It is correctly rooted in an Ephesians 6 setting, but bears more to the story narrative of Frank Perretti's "This present darkness" than a healthy and balanced biblical view of evil. In the end, as Nigel Wright wrote in "The Satan Syndrome" we need to "disbelieve the devil" and treat him for what he is, which is defeated!

So, the life of the Spirit can be enjoyed to the full without the weight of the extras (isn't this what the Pharisees did?) that some Christians seem to want to apply and burden us with. In the end, we don't need to conjure up God with "statements into the heavenlies", or "exorcise ley lines" in fact all this extra stuff can actually detract us from doing the Gospel properly, from sharing it and getting amongst the ordinary people of our community in a credible and effective way, because we're too busy doing wierd things, and behaving like witch doctors on the side of a hill somewhere.
In the end, I want to get excited about God, be moving in the experience, truth, gifts, fruit and power of the Spirit, and to do so knowing that I don't need to conjure up God by an emotional expereince or by whipping myself into a frenzy, because in his grace God in Jesus Christ has promised to always be there! I will clap God when I feel the freedom to do so, and I certainly don't need to be told to.
So in the end, I'm that type of charismatic. In fact, lose that word. I'm a Spirit filled Christian!

A grief observed

Well I haven't felt able to blog for a few weeks now, but I thought I might just put a few words down.
The death of our father last week has brought an end of an era, or at least that's how it feels. The funeral is on Monday.
We all count it a real privilege to have been with him at the last, and he waited till we were all present, or so it would seem.
As a Christian Minister I deal with the grieving fairly often, but I haven't been prepared for my own grief. This is "the day" which you long for least and yet which you know is inevitable.
I have found myself crying at the strangest of times - driving behind the wheel, or listening to music, or looking at photo's of dad. There has been laughter too, and there has been busyness as these moments always seem to bring stuff that has to be done in preparation. I haven't been prepared for the waves of grief: one moment I can be absolutely fine and feel ready to throw myself into work and activity, and the next grief comes at you from behind you and overwhelms you, and then it is gone again. And then hours later it comes again.
We have caught ourselves doing the things that Dad would do; instinctively and without thought busying ourselves practically, or by funny and peculiar habits than seem inbred within our family.
My brothers and I are to share a tribute each at the service on Monday, and it is the preparation of these words that has left me both empty in tears, and full with pride and joy to have had such a Dad as we have had. So many talents and abilities and experiences, many of which have been passed on (and continue to be) through the generations. It has been in the writing of the flower cards that tears have come most rapidly. "Thank you Dad for giving us everything; safe in the arms of Jesus now; no more suffering."
So we move towards Monday with trepidation and with the Christian hope: "Jesus said I am the resurection and the life. He who believes in me, though he die, he shall live."

A cocktail please, shaken, not stirred ..

Well, I haven't blogged for a few weeks - the frequencies have been jammed and energy levels have been low ....whatever that means!

So I'm off for the seasonal Baptist Council next week. There are 3 this year in contrast to the normal 2. That's how important a year it is for the Baptist Union. It will be good to see folks and catch up. What I observe is that the world of blogging and having your opinion on baptist future has been at full warp drive over the last few months. It would seem that to be seen to expressing an opinion and then blogging about - maybe even on a weekly basis, is what sets you apart. A baptist worthy! A leader of the watery congregational masses! One to watch! Blogging of course demonstrating that we can all have an opinion and instantly publish those views.
And it is important for us to express views, though to be honest I haven't yet seen the view that I want to express in beyond400.net which is "what about pastoral care of pastors?" I'm still waiting for the quiet thud of an email to hit my inbox asking me to write the article (I'm not losing sleep over it, really).
But I wonder how its all going to work out? So many opinions and views! Could it end up as a mish-mash or dare I even utter the baptistic liturgical curse (p23 patterns and prayers) "compromise". Where almost there are too many views that the exercise becomes one of merely keeping everyone happy - ooh shiver my baptist baptismal gown and Spurgeon turn over in your grave! In the end, the famous american presidential quote "it's the economy stupid" will almost certainly be the deciding factor. ie affordability. Regardless of that, I'm seriously (tongue in cheek) considering setting up a "Past Steering Group" to compare and contrast with "The Future's Group" so that we can all sit round and remember the good old days over a gin and tonic.
Enough of this! I'm probably in too much trouble now anyway.

Membership - here's a queer line of thought. I keep pondering Baptist Church membership and thinking - does it enable us to grow or stop us from growing? If you didn't have membership, and there might be some good arguments to not have, then how would you express committed core in church life?

Journey - the importance of spiritual journey in the local church as an arena for mission to take place within also keeps coming up in WBC these days. Our language is changing and for the good. Can our churches be places for people of faith and no faith and some faith, be arenas for journey to discover God in. The problem is that whilst I am certain that they should be, the old wine of baptist church life, which is often expressed in "covenant" may well be one of the many hindrances.

God told me - finally for this week. We are back in the days very much of "God told me" and so (and this is the consequential un stated script) basically stuff anyone else and anything anyone says that might - just might ring biblically true or may just sniff of wisdom, I'm going to do what I want to do, and discguise it maybe as "God told me." I've always seen scripture dominate on things like "test the spirits" and "weigh the word". When you make decisions in isolation, be prepared to end up isolated!

Father

Challenging days personally as my family respond and care for my Dad who is in hospital, having had a fall last week. Nothing broken, but at the age of 91 - alotted with all the many other struggles of being that old, a fall is significant.

I was thinking how important Dad's are, and reliving the many memories I have of my dad:
I remember the numerous occasions when I would be ill in bed with a temperature and dad would always worry, and then at the end of the day re-appear with a bottle of Lucozade to give me recovery energy.

I remember the moment when we laid the concrete for the house drive and we all had to dip our toes into concrete to imprint our feet into the finished drive.

The moment when we were sailing just he and me, and the wind became too strong and I was panicking and we had to beach because I wasn't heavy enough.

The numerous times Dad would be doing DIY and I would watch and learn, and how he would let me have a go.

The days when he and mum would come to watch me play rugby, even though other priorities could have called.

The times when he would mend my bike, and when the car came later - sometimes at late hours, spend time and effort repairing it to make it work.

I remember Dad's constantly messy office desk - papers everywhere, and thinking how on earth can he ever find anything, and then 30 years on find that my desk has ended up the same.

I think of the spirit in my dad that never gave up, that never gave in to something being un-mendable and the amazing lateral thinking that produced solutions where others would have thrown away.

More recently I remember Dad saying to me how he was so proud of me, as he in his frailty had lost dexterity and technical ability and watched me do, what he used to, and feeling so deeply moved by Dad's words.

The days ahead are really quite challening, and I'm not sure that I let alone my mum or my brothers are ready for what may or may not develop.

Loving what I do

I love what I do as a Pastor - I think I've kind of blogged on this before, so pardon me please, but this is fresh in me this morning.

Last night I spent time visiting someone and shared with them about the baptism of the Holy Spirit and the challenge of struggling with the old and the new person (as Paul puts it in Romans) and how character change and growth can be a struggle.

But when I compare last night with what I have also done this week and recently, it shows the huge breadth and variety - I have hoovered the church hall, cleaned some church toilets, prep'd a discussion document on mentoring and christian education, prep'd the leaders agenda and minutes, scoured the net for the best price on a Henry Hoover, and recently spent some time re-wiring and positioning the church broadband router.
Then I've spent time thinking, reflecting and planning - and oh yes, preping last week a sermon on "Hope". Planned a few services online, engaged in some Baptist Association work, and followed the Church of England synod debates on twitter. Then i have admin'd some church papers, visited a few people to listen and pray with them, checked through some minutes, glued a church table, stacked some chairs, and done an assembly, planned my diary and spent some time listening to others and yes, listening to myself!

Then I've updated the church web site, done some planning on my own personal web site and spent a few moments social networking - oh yes! This week my car developed a moment of black smoke, but I sorted that once I realised the air-con belt was coming off - so a quick fiddle and mend. Yes, I do love fiddling with practical stuff, DIY, and electronics or computing - all part of being a pastor it would seem, and I do have those skills in my bag. I've spent some time listening to elderly parents and the emotions that come with their struggles.

No funerals recently, but that might change, you never know given the cold. Now, if I'm wise, I need to plan for sunday week's sermon - again, on hope; I hope I can sort that and get ahead, because next week is half term and I always, always blank that out for family. Then there is the cleaning and dusting and ironing to do at home too - I tend to have mass moments on those, though Claire is very good too when she has time. My fundamental focus at the moment though is my family and my wife.

There is a tremendous variety in being a Pastor. That at time can be a huge delight and joy and at other times the variety is the very worst part of the job. Sometimes you long for a borring, steady, regular activity, and at other times the variety makes it!

But I suppose what is really coming to me in recent days is that I have a growing passion for the pastoral care and support of other Christian Leaders and Pastor's. After 20+ years in ministry I can honestly say that I know what it's like to be pastoring a church. I know the heights and the depths of the call, the moments of delight and pain. And in short I have a passion to be with Pastor's in their struggles and to help them and care for them pro-actively with what I hope would be wisdom, encouragement and insight. What I've learned through my own struggles has not been lost in a Romans 8: 28 context, and I have much that I feel I can pass on.

There is a website that people are getting excited alot about in the baptist zone called beyond400.net. It seems you have to be a big cheese to contribute, but if I had to contribute something for the UK Baptist world (and I doubt I'll get asked) in the next few decades (past the 400 years we have been in the UK), I would write an article on "Who Pastor's the Pastors" and the priority of Pastoral Care for Christian Leaders.

Where I have blogged in recent months on Christian Ministry undergoing major paradigm shifts predominantly in the local church scene, leads me to ask the question - I wonder if how we operate regionally, and in particular in pastoral care of Pastors, is also about to change?

Oh, and just to finish, you can buy a Henry Hoover for £55 on ebay!

A sign of the times and stuff

I keep my eyes open - sometimes it a bit like radar, but this morning something quite profound caught my eye as I paid for the fuel at the petrol station on the school run. It was a mum and two girls at the Costa counter. The girls were primary aged and in school uniform - standard for that time of dy. But what caught my eye was that she was saying for them to choose a sausage roll from the hot counter. Perhaps not unusual, except that it was just past 8am. Then my mind did some jumps and I realised that it was their breakfast. Then I did some more jumps and thought - yes, the mum looks single, on her own, and this was the best that she could do before school for them. As I walked out of the shop, I did a quick suss of the car they had gotten into, and well yes, ok, my prejudice made me do some more jumps, and concluded that she was recently seperated. Well, I don't know whether I was right or wrong, or whether my Sherlock deduction was appropriate, but I came away feeling sad for a while as I did the life building summary of those 3 lives that I had seen. Right or wrong, I do that some times, and couldn't help but think that it was a sign of the times that we are living in.

Well its February, and time is shifting on. I get the feeling that this year is going to speed by what with all that is planned nationally for us. Mixed emotions on that - do i want this year to steam by or go slow?

Seasons of the Soul

I am learning alot at the moment - it's the season that I am going through. I am learning what I need,or what God thinks I need, not what I necessarily want. The sociological difference of these two words is always very different!

There are two pieces of scripture that are very much in my mind at this time.

Ecclesiastes 3 New International Version (NIV)

A Time for Everything
1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:
2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
6 a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
8 a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

And the second scripture: 1 Corinthians 13:11

11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me.

I am finding that this is and needs to be a season where personal growth is the aim. We all go through seasons emotionally and spiritually. Seasons can arrive for all kinds of reasons - because God wants it to be so, or allows it to happen, to test and refine us - for character growth and for the future, and because baggage and issues bring us to that point of change and therein personal growth.

I am finding that I need for my own sanity re-evaluate in a slower pace of life the things that have been happening. As a Pastor, that's very difficult. We lead such hugely pressurised lives - at times it feels that everyone and thing wants a part of me. We are forever balancing spinning plates and people's expectations of what they think we should be doing - their expectations, are pretty much always too much and not realistic. Out of interest, there is a key question here - "Who Pastor's the Pastor?" I won't explore this hugely just now, but in Baptist Ministry, the pastoral care is a huge question. It is often reactive, not pro-active, and pretty much, and in my view sadly, we are left to our own devices by the BU to sort out our own support structures and caring. We are Professionals as Pastor's, but I know of no other profession where support is not properly present - supervision, spiritual direction. And in these days of economic squeeze, and other priorities, we are all finding that we need more support, and more encouragement and off loading of the things that are happening to us on the coal face of local church ministry.

But here is what is happening for me: The season I am is teaching me that my priorities have been wrong. Before I would do or die anything at a drop of a hat in my ministry as a Pastor, running to respond to this or that situation or project or meeting. But now, I cannot do that because my priorities have all been wrong. My priority in my life is God - my personal walk with him, and closely followed by total priority of my wife Claire and our family of 3 children. They need me and I must and want to be there for them. And then follows my work as a Pastor of a church and all that entails. I'm not going to give an extensive list here, but I know that for some what I have written may be upsetting, but I'm sorry my faith in God is paramount - my walk as a disciple, and my wife and family are a total priority, and they need me and deserve not second best, but primary place!

God is growing me in other areas of my life too. He is challenging me and I am not finding that all together easy. But it is spiritual, emotional and personal growth, and I am in his hands. What better place can there be in this season?

Tortoise ministries

There's something about January that is dangerous! The tendency in some to do new things can, for numerous others, be quite dangerous. In the years that I have been a Pastor - over 20 years now, I have seen and for a time been a part of the brigade that goes for the latest things. It's just so tempting you see to rush after the latest things because others are doing it, and to merely follow the rush without asking questions. I guess that the impetouos age of youth is often characterised by this kind of activity: it darts after the new without question because others are doing so, and it merely supports the trend mindset that "this is what anybody who is really in is doing, and if you're not, then you're yesterday!"
My New Testament lecturer (God Bless AC!), once exclaimed to the gathered seminar "But God is always, always, always, doing a new thing!" And, he is right. There is something about the Tortoise you see, who indeed goes on to win the race, that is powerfully true of many aspects of life, and one of those is the Christian life, and within that Christian Ministry.
And so I guess that what I am saying is that the Gospel never changes, but how it is to be presented does. Well no new insights there then, it's not rocket science!
Yes, but the importance of starting the new year steadily and slowly picking up the rhythm of the beat seems to be where I am. There is surely widsom here.

The country stagnates within an economic depression and the one thing people are not doing is rushing anywhere. There are no easy solutions or answers, and the general, ordinary person of the UK is merely intent upon survival. The populous is weary of easy answers and quick fixes, and this is where the "old, old story, presented in new, new ways" must surely come in. What people are looking for and needing more than anything else in January 2012 is "hope". And the Gospel has it. Hebrews 6: 19 says - "We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure." This is for me a challenge and an opportunity. A challenge personally and an opportunity for every Christian to usher in revival.

New Year - wierd time ... wierd people

I reckon I've said it before...but I'll say it again - New year is a wierd time! This year,we've not had the snow ... so far, so life is not on hold whilst everyone struggles to get from A to B or simply go out and play in it.
But there is a spectrum of behaviours in terms of the new year, isn't there? Some throw everything they can it new opportunities, others merely keep going as it was. Some make big plans and go mad in planning and diary stuff, others merely keep going as it was!
I don't want to dismiss the "do new things" camp, but there is a danger in doing some things that are so radical that they cannot be sustained. And if life is so full of change then the opposite effect to that which was desired can be the end result.
For a whole lot of other people - and I count myself in this camp this year, I feel I'm scrambling around at the moment trying to get my bearings in terms of what direction to go in. I'm doing what I guess are the important things - diary, paper work and ensuring that I do the ordinary things ok. But as it making announcements about "this is the direction to go in" then I am at the momenet reticent. Does this happen the older you get I ask myself? Am I merely, once again, a common statistic? Answer - probably yes!
And another thing - energy is low, but the to-do list if high. Can I flag up the enthusiasm to hit these things? Nah - the spiritual gift of procrastination needs to fully play its part!
But I find that if I have an enormous downer on myself as a result of this "spirit of sluggishness" that actually I will simply be worse off, and probably others around me too. So i find no sense of guilt in where I am, but am content to await the waves of the Spirit of God come when the time is right.
All that said, for me this is a time of internal growth. Of reflection and of recognising that I might not be the person I want to be, God wants me to be, and maybe others need me to me! I guess I'm just wierd then!

Music - the missing ingredient

Well Happy New Year! I hope you have a good one.
I was, in one of those rare "down tools network is sleeping in power save mode" moments during the Christmas break, reflecting that what I miss at the moment in my life is music. I think it was a number of things that might have triggered this - a visit to here Handel's Messiah, a listening to Carols from Kings and one other music moment where I perhaps selfishly on Boxing day +1 sat with my head phones on whilst the rest of the family played Monopoly.
Now I'm not absent from music sunday by sunday, but I am missing music for me. I find my spirit aching for music at times because I honetsly believe that God has created everyone for music, in as much as it seems to be a part of the creative ingredient that God has put within all. And music would therefore appear to very much a part of spirituality.
My upbringing has been musical - a choir boy at one point, then I have sung in Dorset Opera in Aida and Turandot whilst at Sherborne. And whilst there sang in the town's local choral society in things like the Christmas Oratorio and Verdi's Reqiuem. But I guess my parents always had some kind of music going on in the background, and much of that sank in. I tried the clarinet once - too much like hard work, and wanted to play the guitar, but my parents refused! If only ...! But within church settings I have had a huge amount of renewal music pumped into me, as well the traditonal hymns of childhood. Not to mention my teenage and twent years of rock and pop and jazz and ...well in fact I like it all and have fairly broad tastes. I find music will move me to tears as memories come flashing by.
And I'm missing music. I'm missing singing chorally and that sense of being a part of something that isn't what I do perhaps as a Pastor. My question to myself, is whether I should do something about that. Have I the time. Life feels out of balance without it. And I think i should change that.